False Starts and what the heck is happening!

The count down is on. It is what every parent looks forward to after a long day, whether you will admit it or not. Bedtime! Baby is cozy in their crib and you tippy toe out of the room, close the door, and sigh in relief. Some of us have more work to do, some of us start to pick up the house, while some of us have that glass of wine and just sat on the couch. Then 20 minutes in and you hear that sweet baby crying, cooing, or even talking away. WHAT THE HECK!

Fixing False starts and understanding what is causing them go hand in hand to prevent this from being a nightly occurrence.

The NUMBER ONE Culprit is an over tired baby. Think about it, when you are just exhausted you don’t get quality sleep. You toss and turn and wake several times a night. The same thing happens with our babies. Only in most cases, that baby doesn’t have the skill set yet to to put themselves back to sleep.

Another reason could be the inconsistency of routine. The Inconsistency of a schedule (which also relates to overtired). Our babies thrive on routine and knowing what to expect next. Establishing a good 20-30 mintues night time routine will help your baby know it is bed time, it triggers the brain to start settling down and getting ready for bed.

The third reason is your baby doesn’t have the skill set at all to fall asleep on their own. If your child relies on your to fall asleep, whether it is rocking, patting, nursing, or whatever it may be, they will continue to need that each and every time they wake up at night to fall back asleep. They just simply do not know that they can go back to bed without it.

How do you fix it or prevent it from happening?

1. Prioritize bed time. This includes a solid bedtime routine. I like to start with a bath, feeding, jammies, book, song, bed – for a quick example. Prioritizing bedtime also looks like prioritizing the timing and wake windows. This starts with daytime sleep and moving into the evening. An overtired baby will not sleep well. Period. Understanding appropriate wake windows for your baby will go a long way. More on this in my blog, “Wake windows by age”
2. Help your child learn the skills for sleep. Yes, that means sleep “Training.” I prefer to call it sleep teaching. No that doesn’t mean you have to leave your child in the bed at night to cry themselves to sleep. If you have more questions on how to start that process, book a call with me, I would be happy to chat!
3. Creating an appropriate sleep environment. A dark, cool room is most ideal. Avoid anything stimulating in the crib, above the crib, or in your baby’s room. Use a sound machine to block out any exterior noise in the house. Set your child up for success in their environment that promotes calm and sleep.
4. Avoid any resting period leading into bed time. You want to promote calm going into bedtime, but for those younger babies, calm may convert to releasing some sleep pressure that is needed to promote a good night sleep. On the other hand, you also want to avoid any overstimulating activities that include screen time or overly active play. That is why having a 20-30 minute bedtime routine is also important to help cue your child and not have too much down time or too much excitement.
5. Staying consistent. This isn’t a one and done deal. Consistency is the most important thing any parent can do for their child. We are both continuously growing and learning new skills. Staying consistent brings calm to your child.

The best way to stop false starts is to understand the why behind it and knowing the steps that can help solve it.